Reviews

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A

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
AATANK (1996)
rad2andahalf The heroic Jesu battles criminals and a giant shark to save his village, in this infamous Bollywood knock-off of JAWS.
THE ABCS OF DEATH (2012)
rad2 A gonzo horror anthology featuring twenty-six short films from twenty-six different directors.

 

B

 Jim Kelly stars as the titular martial arts hero who battles

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
BAD MILO (2013)
rad3 When severely stressed out, a demon crawls out of Duncan’s butt and attacks those who have angered him.
THE BATTERY (2012)
3_and_a_half_rads Two baseball players wander around New England during a zombie apocalypse in this cool indie Horror/Drama.
BLACK BELT JONES (1974)
3_and_a_half_rads Jim Kelly “clobbers the mob” in this martial arts Blaxploitation classic!
BLACULA (1972)
3_and_a_half_rads Cursed centuries ago by Count Dracula, Prince Mamuwalde awakens in 1970s Los Angeles as Blacula: The Dark Prince of Darkness!
BURIAL GROUND: THE NIGHTS OF TERROR (1981)
rad3 Tool-wielding zombies and a creepy midget portraying a child with a severe Oedipal complex, are just some of the highlights of this classic Italian masterpiece. [Review contributed by “Holly Hobgoblin.”]
THE BURNING (1981)
3_and_a_half_rads A classic Summer camp slasher flick featuring a vengeful burn victim that hacks up kids and counselors with a pair of razor-sharp garden shears!

C

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
CANNIBAL FLESH RIOT! (2007)
3_and_a_half_rads Two flesh-eating ghouls get more than they bargain for when they “dig up some grub” in a cemetery.
THE CAR (1977)
3_and_a_half_rads A remote desert community is terrorized by a demonic Lincoln Continental.
CARRIE (2013)
rad3 A young girl lashes out at her tormentors with her telekinetic powers, in this modern retread of the classic Stephen King tale.
CLASH OF THE TITANS (2010)
rad2 Perseus struggles against gods and monsters to rescue the kingdom of Argos, in this insipid remake of the 1981 classic.
CLASS OF 1984 (1982)
rad4andahalf An idealistic teacher is pushed to his limits by a violent gang of teenagers in this prophetic cult classic!
CLOSED FOR THE SEASON (2010)
rad3 Two people trapped within a long-abandoned amusement park have a series of bizarre, mind-warping encounters with the unknown.
COWBOYS VS. DINOSAURS (2015)
rad2 A cowboy must win back the heart of the woman he loves while battling a horde of exploding prehistoric carnivores!
THE CRUSH (1993)
3_and_a_half_rads A magazine writer’s life becomes pure hell after he spurns the sexual advances of the Lolita next door.

D

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
DARK ANGEL (1990)
3_and_a_half_rads Dolph Lundgren teams with a stuffy FBI agent to take down a drug dealer… from outer space!
DEEP BLOOD (1989)
radonepointfive.gif Four friends that made a blood pact in their youth, reunite years later and battle a Great White that may house an evil Native American spirit.

E

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
EVIL DEAD (2013)
3_and_a_half_rads A group of teens meet gory ends at the hands of demonic possessors in this modernized reboot.

F

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
THE FINAL GIRLS (2015)
rad4 Five friends are stranded within an 80s horror movie in this fun spoof of slasher cinema!
FUTUREWORLD (1976)
rad3 An evil plot to replace people with robotic clones is afoot, and only Peter Fonda can save the day!

G

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
THE GARBAGE PAIL KIDS MOVIE (1987)
rad2 A bullied teen befriends The Garbage Pail Kids. Fart, urine, snot, and vomit sight gags ensue.
THE GUARDIAN (1990)
3_and_a_half_rads A young couple hires a live-in nanny to take care of their newborn son, only to discover that she’s actually an infant-abducting druid!

 

H

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
HORROR EXPRESS (1972)
rad4 A mind-sucking monster is on the loose on the Trans-Siberian Express, and only two scientists to stop it.

 

I

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
IT FOLLOWS (2014)
3_and_a_half_rads After a sexual encounter, a young woman finds herself pursued by a relentless evil entity.

J

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
JAWS (1975)
rad5
Steven Spielberg’s classic film! A heroic trio ventures out to sea to kill a huge, man-eating Great White shark that is terrorizing an island community.
JAWS: THE ‘SHARKSPLOITATION’ EDIT (2009)
3_and_a_half_rads
A “grindhoused” fan edit of the original Summer blockbuster! It features footage from other films, a vastly different soundtrack, and a surprise ending!

K

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE (1988)
rad4 Clown-like aliens invade a small town, and turn its inhabitants into cotton candy in this hilarious Science Fiction Horror-Comedy from the Chiodo brothers.
KUNG FURY (2015)
rad4 An kung-fu supercop from the 80s travels back in time to bring Adolf Hitler (the “Kung Fuhrer”) to justice, in this extremely fun and over-the-top indie short!

 

L

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
THE LAST SHARK (1981)
 rad3 An author and shark hunter team up to kill a Great White Shark that is terrorizing their small seaside town, in this infamous Italian knock-off of JAWS!
LEGEND OF DINOSAURS AND MONSTER BIRDS (1977)
3_and_a_half_rads Disco-funk music sets the mood for this odd tale of man-eating prehistoric monsters in Japan. If you’re looking for a dark, violent, and overly artsy kaiju flick, then look no further!
LEPRECHAUN 3 (1995)
radonepointfive.gif The Leprechaun visits Las Vegas in this third entry in the oddly popular horror franchise. [Review contributed by Jason Todd. Part of the WORST HORROR SEQUELS series.]
LURKING FEAR (1994)
rad2andahalf Cannibalistic albinos, gangsters, and Jeffrey Combs clash in this sub-par adaptation of an H.P. Lovecraft short story.

M

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
MAD MAX: FURY ROAD (2015)
rad5 Max Rockatansky returns to the big screen after thirty years! Max defies a mighty warlord and becomes the savior to an oppressed people, in this adrenaline-fueled post-apocalyptic action flick!
MAKO: THE JAWS OF DEATH (1976)
3_and_a_half_rads  Richard Jaeckel stars in this obscure oddity about a man who can communicate with sharks, and uses his ability to get revenge on those that have wronged him and his finned friends!
THE MONSTER SQUAD (1987)
rad5 A group of monster movie-obsessed kids battle Count Dracula and his monstrous minions to save the world!
MOONTRAP (1989)
3_and_a_half_rads Two astronauts discover the remains of an ancient civilization on the moon, and a bio-mechanical terror that could threaten humanity’s very existence! [Review contributed by Ryan Brewer.]

N

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
THE NEVERENDING STORY (1984)
rad4 Classic ’80s flick about a young boy that takes part in a great adventure to save the fantasy world of Fantasia.

O

 

P

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM (1961)
3_and_a_half_rads A young man comes to Medina castle seeking answers about his sister’s death, and instead finds deceit, torture, and murder! Great classic horror directed by Roger Corman, and featuring Vincent Price!
PLANET OF DINOSAURS (1977)
rad2andahalf Intergalactic castaways are stranded on a planet full of prehistoric monsters in this sci-fi snoozer.
POLICE STORY / POLICE STORY 2 (1985/1988)
rad4

rad3

A Hong Kong cop woos the ladies and battles vicious criminals in this awesome Jackie Chan double feature!

 

Q

 

R

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
THE RAVEN (1963)
rad3 Vincent Price and Boris Karloff are dueling wizards in this loose adaptation of Edgar Allen Poe’s famous poem.
ROBOCOP (1987)
rad5 After dying in the line of duty, police officer Alex Murphy is built into a crime-fighting cyborg.
ROBOCOP (2014)
rad3 The reboot of the RoboCop franchise that nobody asked for. It turned out to be surprisingly watchable.
ROBOCOP 2 (1990)
rad4 Robocop battles the crazy leader of a drug cult and a cyborg replacement in this oddball sequel.
ROBOCOP 3 (1993)
rad3 Robocop aids a group of freedom fighters against an army of mercenaries and a robotic ninja in this much-hated sequel.

S

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
SHARKANSAS WOMEN’S PRISON MASSACRE (2016)
rad2andahalf A sexy all-girl chain gang is attacked by prehistoric sharks in an Arkansas swamp, in this made for TV schlock.
SHARK KILL (1976)
rad2 Two men venture out to sea to kill a Great White Shark in this made-for-TV snoozer.
SINS OF THE DRAGON (2012)
3_and_a_half_rads Two young martial artists are on a quest for revenge in this indie kung-fu epic.
SUPER SOUL BROTHER (1978)
rad2 A wino obtains superhuman strength when injected with a special formula, in this obscure Blaxploitation flick.

T

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
TAI-CHI HERO (2012)
3_and_a_half_rads The “zero” from TAI CHI HERO becomes a hero!
TAI-CHI ZERO (2012)
rad4 A kung-fu steampunk throwdown!
TALES OF DRACULA (2015)
3_and_a_half_rads Count Dracula, the Wolf Man, and the Frankenstein Monster headline this indie throwback to classic Universal monster movies!
THE THING (1982)
A shape-shifting creature terrorizes the isolated inhabitants of a U.S. Antarctic research facility in this beloved John Carpenter adaptation of “Who Goes There?”
THE THING (2011)
An international research team wishes they left their latest discovery buried in the ice in this prequel to John Carpenter’s THE THING!
THE THING FROM ANOTHER WORLD (1951)
rad4 A creature from outer space terrorizes an Arctic research station in this Sci-Fi classic!
THE TOWN THAT DREADED SUNDOWN (1976)
3_and_a_half_rads A docudrama based on the true case of a masked serial killer that terrorized Texarkana in the late 1940s.

U

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
UP FROM THE DEPTHS (1979)
rad2 Idiotic tourists at a Hawaiian resort battle a voracious prehistoric fish in this cheap Corman-produced knock-off of JAWS.

V

W

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
WAR OF THE GARGANTUAS (1966)
rad4 The fate of Japan hangs in the balance when two giant monsters spawned from the DNA of Toho’s Frankenstein Monster, duke it out!
WOLFCOP (2014)
3_and_a_half_rads Cultists turn drunken deputy Lou Garou into a crime-fighting werewolf!
WOOCHI: THE DEMON SLAYER (2009)
rad3 A womanizing Taoist wizard awakens in modern times to battle the evil wizard that framed and imprisoned him!

X

Y

Z

Movie Title Rating Synopsis
ZOMBIE FIGHT CLUB (2014)
rad2 In the future, survivors of a zombie apocalypse are forced to take part in gladiatorial combat with the undead.