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Well it was just a matter of time: The JURASSIC PARK franchise has spawned another film, this time helmed by Gareth Edwards, whose previous efforts include MONSTERS, 2014’s GODZILLA, ROGUE ONE: A STAR WARS STORY, and THE CREATOR. JURASSIC WORLD: REBIRTH takes place five years after JP: DOMINION (ugh) and has a special team (led by Scarlet Johansson) venturing to an island full of saurian monstrosities created by the long defunct inGen Corporation, this time to extract dino-DNA in an effort to create some sort of medical breakthrough.
I’ve heard mixed reactions thus far, but I’m sure it’ll be a great popcorn flick that will properly kick-off the already crowded Summer blockbuster season. And seeing how Edwards has proven to be capable of effectively utilizing digital effects, I’m sure that at the very least, the dinosaurs (and dinosaur-adjacent beasties) will look fantastic on the big screen!
Believe it or not, I’m looking forward to [eventually] seeing JP: REBIRTH, mainly because I’m a total sucker for dinosaur flicks! And its’ release has me reminiscing about a time in my life where the daily grind of adulthood seemed so far away and inconsequential. A time when my future as a famous paleontologist seemed so damned certain.
So let’s take a trip back in time to the early 1990s, an erea where Nintendo was battling Sega for video game supremacy, the Beanie Baby craze was in full swing, the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers premiered and became a surprise hit, and Blockbuster Video conquered the home video rental market. Prepare to immerse yourself in my Jurassic memories!
I don’t quite recall what caused by childhood obsession with dinosaurs (I’m leaning towards seeing the original KING KONG at an early age), but I was hooked on everything and anything involving the long extinct creatures that preceded humanity. I drew thousands of sketches, built several plywood dinosaur skeleton kits, constantly checked out dinosaur books from the local library, and watched multiple dinosaur-themed cartoons including DINO-RIDERS, DINOSAUCERS, and DENVER: THE LAST DINOSAUR.
Thanks to the video store boom at the time, dinosaur movies were on a regular rotation on one of several TVs in our house, with such classics as BABY: SECRET OF THE LOST LEGEND, MY SCIENCE PROJECT, PLANET OF THE DINOSAURS, THE LAND THAT TIME FORGOT, and a healthy dose of GODZILLA movies all fueling my imagination! I even had a VHS tape called DINOSAURS! A FUN-FILLED TRIP BACK IN TIME, that I watched constantly.
It was a bizarre half-hour educational video that features Fred Savage as a procrastinating kid trying to figure out a topic for his science project that is due the following day. (Dinosaurs, duh!) The video contains an incredibly catchy musical number (“Mezozoic Mind“), and a fantastic claymation climax where an ill-tempered T-Rex goes on a killing spree!
In fact, and this is a little embarrassing, I was so dinosaur crazy that I earned the nick-name “Jordinosaur” in middle school. While it was made up by kids that were trying to bully me, I proudly made the moniker my own. I even had my own “Jordinosaur” letterhead thanks to my 6th grade English teacher, Ms. Vitale, who apparently saw potential in yours truly’s writing ability. She was a really supportive teacher, and she made a lasting impression on me.
I sometimes wonder what she’d say if she found out I spent half my life writing about movies on the web, just for fun. Would she applaud my efforts? Make corrections to my grammar syntax, and point out spelling errors? Or would she just lower her head in shame because of all of that wasted potential? I guess I’ll never know…. which is probably for the best.
In early 1993, I started reading Michael Crichton’s JURASSIC PARK, which had a “Soon to Be a Major Motion Picture” blurb on the cover. I had learned through some sort of print media that Spielberg’s adaptation of the book was coming out that Summer and I was losing my mind, especially after I saw some production photos in a one-off DINOSAUR magazine that was published by STARLOG! (Which I still have to this day, though it’s not in great condition.)
But before JURASSIC PARK could blow everyone’s collective minds, an upstart named Roger Corman was rushing to get his own dinosaur film out to the masses and capitalize on all the JP buzz, namely CARNOSAUR! Adapted from a book that was full of sex, violence, and rampaging dinosaurs, Corman’s low-budget film would turn out to be a far cry from its source material. But it contained dinosaurs, so I just had to see it!
And wouldn’t you know it, according to my beloved TV Guide, CARNOSAUR was set to premiere on Cinemax (for one night only, which was pretty damned odd) shortly after it’s small theatrical run in mid-May of ’93! The only problem? It was going to be on way after my bed-time! (Argh!) However fate stepped in that night in the form of growing pains. Crying and unable to sleep because of the throbbing ache in my calves, I was given some Tylenol by my mom who, God bless her, sat up with me to watch Corman’s R-rated indie creature feature.
The Carnosaur novel that the film is very loosely based upon, features an eccentric British Lord who clones dinosaurs for his private zoo using DNA from fossil fragments and injecting it into chicken eggs. Eventually his secret is discovered thanks to an intrepid reporter, and the dinosaurs end up getting released to create carnage in the nearby sleepy village of Warchester, leading to a cool showdown between the British military and rampaging dinosaurs!
Meanwhile the film has a mad scientist, played by three-time Academy Award Nominee Diane Ladd, who releases a deadly virus that kills men and causes women to give birth to dinosaurs. (?!!!!) Her ultimate goal is to wipe out humanity and clear room for her cloned critters. The film concludes with a battle between the lead character “Doc” Smith (piloting a skid-steer loader) and a Tyrannosaurus Rex, before taking a surprisingly dark turn at the end that is almost reminiscent of George A. Romero’s THE CRAZIES.
Needless to say, I was disappointed with CARNOSAUR, citing that the book had way more than two dinosaurs. My mom on the other hand was clearly relieved that the movie was over, judging by her disgusted reactions to the gory bits throughout the film. Looking back, I don’t think she realized what she was getting herself into, and I really don’t think she approved of me watching that movie. Regardless, she didn’t complain once and took one for the team because the movie kept me distracted from my pain.
As June 11th, 1993 neared I was pumped to see JURASSIC PARK, but crestfallen to learn that all screenings at both of our local multiplexes were SOLD OUT for the weekend! My mom assured me that she would take me to see it the following week, but that didn’t improve my morale. I knew that come Monday morning, most of my classmates would be talking about the movie and rub it in that “Jordinosaur” didn’t get a chance to see it. When Friday came, I went to school as usual but was obviously dejected that I was about to miss out on the movie event of the year.
I don’t recall what class I was in that day, but I do remember the pang of fear I felt when I suddenly heard my name called out over the loudspeaker to report to the principal’s office. My mind raced. “What did I do? Am I in trouble? Why does the principal want to see me?!” I worriedly walked downstairs to the ground floor of (the former) East Scranton Intermediate School, towards my impending doom. Then I suddenly saw my mother walk out into the hallway with the principal.
Confused, I asked why she was there. “Oh, you have a doctor’s appointment today that I forgot about. So I came to pick you up.” In my preadolescent mind, I was now certain that I was about to have the worst day of my life! First I can’t see JURASSIC PARK and now I have a surprise visit with our family doctor?! I was not a happy camper, and I quietly brooded in the passenger seat as we traveled up the Scranton/Carbondale Highway towards the Viewmont Mall in Dickson City, PA.
I looked up at the sign outside the Mall’s parking lot for the (now long gone) Viewmont Mall Cinema, and saw my beloved JURASSIC PARK emblazoned above the other unimportant films currently playing. And that’s when it dawned on me that we weren’t heading in the direction of the doctor’s office. Moments later, my mother revealed that she had done the unthinkable: She had LIED to pull me out of school and was taking me to see JURASSIC PARK! WHAT?! It was unbelievable! I was shocked! Dumbfounded! Awestruck even!
This woman obsessed over my perfect attendance at school and always highlighted the importance of honesty. And now she had just pulled the wool over my eyes to whisk me away in secret to see the movie that had consumed my every thought for weeks! She had broken her own stringent rules to surprise me and brighten my day! To me, it was the ultimate act of parental love and I’ll never forget it.
I will also not forget how I had to keep shushing her during the movie. My mom is one of those “talk at the screen” types, and I had to keep reminding her to be quiet as she commented on the natural beauty of Isla Nublar (portrayed in the film by Kauai, Hawaii), reacted loudly to the now taken-for-granted special effects in the film, and leaned over every so often to ask me “what kind of dinosaur is that?”
A few hours later as I walked out of the movie theater, I realized two things: I have an incredible mom and I NEEDED TO SEE THAT MOVIE AGAIN! And I did, at least twice more in theaters that Summer! (Including once at the Circle Drive-In where it was paired with CONEHEADS!)
Regardless of how good or bad JURASSIC WORLD: REBIRTH is, I’m glad to see that the public’s infatuation with dinosaurs is still alive and well. If anything, a new big-budget dino-epic every three-to-four years means that I can regularly reminisce about some great times with my mom. And heck, maybe I’ll eventually create some new dinosaur-themed memories with my own son. I guess only time will tell!